Monday, November 28, 2011

Induction Scheduled

Well, had my appointment today.  James was awesome on the NST and the ultrasound.  He is doing beautifully! I got diagnosed with polyhydramnios by the actual doc today.  My levels have gone up to 24 cm instead of going down.  They are now concerned about my water breaking before his head is engaged, which could result in the cord slipping through the cervix.  One more thing to be concerned about.  Good news, though - he's head down!  Let's hope he stays that way.

I am set for induction on December 2!  I have an appointment at 7:30 am on Thursday to check my cervix again.  Right now, I'm 1 full cm dilated, and my cervix is soft.  So, maybe with some walking and such, my cervix should dilate some more.  If not, they are going to admit me to L&D on Thursday for Cervadil to dilate me some more, and then give me Pitocin on Friday to bring on contractions.  Our little boy should be here this weekend!  Praying for everything to go smoothly, and for him to be healthy and breathing on his own.

Mom's coming on Wednesday to watch Ella for us.  I'm certainly thankful to have her.  :)

Monday, November 21, 2011

I'll Take the Pregnancy With a Side of Stress, Please

Had my ultrasound, NST and group B strep test this morning.  James is now transverse...hopefully that means he's turning.  He also is measuring about 6 lbs, 15 oz.  He didn't want to wake up for the NST, so the OB referred me to L&D for a repeat NST after lunch.  Apparently, they also do GBS tests differently at this office.  Instead of swiping the swab up and down the nether parts, she stuck them in places they weren't meant to go.  Joy.  It was not a pleasant experience....along with that, she decided to pick at my brain through my cervix again.  1 cm and very thick, by the way.

Jay, doc and I had an honest discussion about cholestasis and early induction.  She's all for inducing on December 2.  I'll be 37 weeks, 2 days.  On top of that, I have to leave from Mom's earlier than planned this weekend just so I can go back to L&D for a repeat NST.  I now have to have them twice a week until I'm induced.  Also, I get another ultrasound on Monday...along with yet another NST.  If he is still sideways or breech, they will be scheduling a version and an induction for Friday, December 2...or so that was the game plan when I left the office.

After eating lunch and going to L&D, spoke with another OB in the practice.  He agreed with the whole game plan but wanted to speak with a doctor at ECU (East Carolina University) for more information regarding bile salt levels and early induction.  The doc at ECU said he doesn't go by the bile salt levels because they aren't really indicative of anything.  He performs an amniocentesis at 37 weeks, and if the lungs are mature, then he induces.  Oh, and Urso is crap...apparently, it doesn't lower the bile salt levels, but it's supposed to reduce the itch.  Great.  So, now, I have to discuss the amniocentesis with the doc on Monday when I go in for my appointment.

I haven't been home since about 9 this morning.  Jay took Ella with him to work after my appointment because they don't allow children under 12 in L&D.  She barely got a nap today.  He told me she fell asleep in the car on the way to his work, and he even got her into the stroller asleep....but, OF COURSE, a Howitzer went off, and the loud blast woke her up...about 30-45 minutes into her nap.  Hoping she hasn't been a complete butthead.

As if all of that wasn't bad enough, I got pulled over on the way home...for expired registration...on Jay's vehicle.  Thankfully, the police officer was really nice.  He cited me and let me go.  Told me to get Jay to get the registration taken care of, and if I go to court on January 13, the ticket would be dismissed.  Yay.

If I wasn't pregnant, I think I would deserve an adult beverage right about now.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Starting to Feel Better

So after being on Ursodiol since Wednesday night, I'm finally starting to feel a bit of a difference with my itching.  It's still pretty intense in the morning and at night...and when I get stressed out...but at least I'm getting some relief during the day.  Baby steps, right?

We go in the morning for our ultrasound, NST, Group B Strep test, and our consultation with the OB.  Thankfully, Jay is going with me, and the OB who originally told me that they would induce before 39 weeks is one of the 2 available tomorrow.  The other is a gentleman whom I have never met.  I'm hoping the OB will override the decision to induce at 39 weeks.  I think I'm almost supposed to have bloodwork done tomorrow to see if my bile salt and LFT levels are coming down.  We shall see.  I'm sure they are.  They have to be.

Had a rude awakening this morning.  After Ella came to sleep with us at 2 this morning, she woke up dry heaving and crying at 6 this morning.  Got her to our bathroom, but she just dry heaved a couple more times and then calmed down.  Not sure what happened.  Guess she got my tendency to get really sick when she gets hot.  Once she calmed down and cooled off, she slept just as calmly as can be until about 7 this morning. She seems to be doing well today and has been in a really great mood all day.  So, hopefully, whatever it was, is over.  I felt so bad for her.  :(

Anyway.  Looking forward to our little man getting here.  Hoping they will still allow us to have a December date for our induction.  Mainly because I don't want to be induced this coming week.  I want to enjoy my Thanksgiving with Mom, Doug and the rest of the family.  Plus, I don't want James's birthday to be anywhere near Thanksgiving.  December 1 would even work.  lol

Friday, November 18, 2011

It Finally Happened...

I had a major meltdown in the tub last night as I was having a heart to heart with James.  All this itching, the lack of sleep, and the possibility of losing my son due to this cholestasis has gotten to me.  I broke down and just sobbed last night.  I don't want to admit it, but I am scared.  I'm trying to be strong and hold it all together, but it's not working.

I have people making me feel like a horrible Christian because I'm not trusting in God to cure me or to take care of things, which isn't entirely true.  I do trust God, but I also believe He gave us doctors to help us.  So, I'm also trusting my doctors to take care of my son and me...though I don't completely agree with them about the course of action to induce at 39 weeks.  I printed out a lot of medical journals yesterday, which all say how critical it is to induce by 38 weeks to reduce the risk of complications associated with this condition.

I just need to get through the weekend and talk to another OB in the practice on Monday.  Thankfully, Jay will be with me, and he agrees with me that the risks of delivering early do not outweigh the risks of waiting until 39 weeks to deliver with this condition.

Sorry for the vent.  I just don't understand how a perfectly normal pregnancy could become high-risk just like that.  Oh, well.  Just have to take it one day at a time.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I am the 1%...

...of pregnant women who develop Intrahepatic Cholestasis of Pregnancy.

It's a mouthful.  Basically, my body isn't clearing out the bile my liver is producing, which means it's being stored under my skin...causing intense and severe itching.

Got a call from my OB office today and was asked to come in because my lab results from Monday were "concerning."  So, I went in and was told my LFT's (liver function tests) were normal, but my bile salts were elevated.  On November 4, my bile salt levels were about 9.  On Monday, they were 34.  They have almost quadrupled in 2 weeks.  So, my body is storing bile instead of processing and flushing it.  The normal range is like 4-26.  So, it's up.  They prescribed me Urso-something or other, which will help flush the bile from my body...and hopefully turn me from a human scratching post back into a normal pregnant lady.  Also, they will be inducing me at 39 weeks, which concerns me.

On November 4, one of the other OB's told me that if I do have cholestasis, they will be inducing me at 37-38 weeks, which is the recommended time frame for delivery when cholestasis is involved.  Delivery after this time increases the risk of the baby passing meconium in utero, fetal stress, meconium inhalation and stillbirth.  Now, this doctor is telling me 39 weeks because anything before that increases the risk of jaundice and poor latch.  Somehow, that doesn't seem nearly as severe, in my opinion, as say...fetal death.

I'm scared and nervous.  Oh, on top of that, I get to have weekly NST's to make sure James is doing well.  So, this coming Monday, I have an ultrasound, NST and a group B strep test.  Just a fun filled morning for sure.

Also, I'm really irritated because my dad threw his 2 cents in and basically called me a hypochondriac.  He said I shouldn't listen to the doctors because nothing is wrong with's all in my head.  He's been saying that for years.  Yes, I am a hypochondriac.  I go to doctors and seek how medications that will make me crap myself silly for the next month because it's so much fun...not because this is extremely dangerous for the baby, and I'm trying to do what's best for my baby.  God may heal, but He also gave us intelligence to become, I'm trusting the doctors.  Besides, test results don't lie.

I'm just so frustrated.  I cried on the way home because I've been so stressed today.  My BP was 140/86 today.  It was 120-something/70-something on Monday.  So, all this itching and lack of sleep has caused my BP to go up.  I really just need a vacation....and I need for this baby to hurry up and get here...before 39 weeks.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Measuring Big For Date

I was 34 weeks and 5 days along yesterday.  Went to my OB appointment for a routine check up.  After sitting half-naked under one of those paper "blankets," aka tablecloths, for what seemed like an hour, I finally saw the midwife.  After going over my birthplan and telling me to scrap it and leave it at avoid ticking off the nurses at the hospital...she listened to James's heartbeat and measured my fundal height.  She looks at me and asks, "Have you been measuring big all along?"  She didn't have my history in front of her.  The office recently switched to an electronic system, and she forgot to bring in her laptop.  Since they haven't said anything about me measuring big and haven't told me my fundal height...I figured I wasn't having any problems.  So, she scheduled me for an ultrasound on Monday after telling me that I was measuring 38 weeks.  Only a smidge ahead......note the hint of sarcasm.  Also, I had a round of determine what could be causing this intense itching I've been having for a week now.  Hoping we'll FINALLY get some sort of results back that can pinpoint the the cause, and we can deal with it from there.

Adding to that, I had a dental appointment yesterday morning and learned I would need my wisdom teeth removed after James is born due to cavities.  Yay.  They are sending me to an oral surgeon, and my insurance doesn't cover anesthesia when the wisdom teeth are above the gumline.  Joy of joy....not to mention they only cover 50% of the procedure, and they only cover $1200 in a fiscal year.  Hoping the fiscal year ends right after my wisdom teeth are removed so I can get these fillings done...and my 6-month cleaning done.  Tired of having dental setbacks.  I finally have time to get my teeth taken care of without fear of losing my job....and now insurance is a problem.  Go figure.

Oh, well.  Jay returned to work today, and the munchkin and I are headed to the commissary for grocery shopping. Hoping not to spend a fortune, but we always seem to.  I still have some stuff I have to get for myself before James comes, and we've been putting it off and putting it off.....and I'm getting really frustrated. So ready for this baby to get here so life can begin to normalize again.  :)

On a good note, I get to see Mom for Thanksgiving!!  :)  We're making the trip to the beach to spend Thanksgiving with her, my stepdad, some family and friends.  :)  Hoping James holds out another couple of weeks!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Oh Dear God! What Did I Do?

Last night...or early this morning...I heard Ella crying on the monitor. I knew she was 2 seconds away from getting up and coming into our room, so I listened for the patter patter patter of her trotting down the hall. What I heard instead was a loud THUD and her screaming. I quickly jumped out of bed and ran down the hallway, where I ran full on into Ella coming out of her bedroom. Since I couldn't stop on a dime, I had to contort myself to keep from toppling over on her while keeping her from toppling over and pulling me down.

I didn't really notice it at first, but within a few seconds, I noticed this searing, tearing pain right at my pubic bone. I had some soreness there a few weeks back, but it went away. So, I didn't get any sleep. I couldn't get comfortable because my crotch felt like it was being ripped in two every time I moved...then, I had to stumble/hobble to the bathroom 3 times to go pee. My poor pubic bone. It feels like someone is trying to tear it out of my body, now.

I have to somehow remember I'm pregnant. You'd think that after 34 and a half weeks, I'd be aware of this fact by now....but I forget sometimes. Is it December yet? I'm so ready to have my coordination back.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Well It Just Hit Me...

We're having another baby in a few short weeks.  Yup.  Been pregnant for 34 weeks, and yet it only just really hit me what that will entail...again.

In just 3 short weeks, I will be term.  If James follows the same track his sister followed, he'll be here in just 4 weeks.  If he comes when the doctors believe he will, he'll be here in about 5 weeks.  My due date is in 6 weeks.  I am so unprepared.

My nursery isn't complete.  Still waiting on some of the decorations and such.  Mentally, I'm unprepared for this. Not that I don't want to see my son and everything, but I just can't believe it's almost that time already.  I have 40-gazillion questions running through my head.  Most of which consist of how Ella is going to handle everything.  How am I going to be able to handle being away from my little girl for at least 2 nights in the hospital?  How is she going to take to having a little brother?  Is she going to change from being my sweet little munchkin who loves to cuddle with Mommy?

I know all of this is normal, but I feel like a bad person sometimes for thinking it.  This pregnancy has just gone by so fast that I really haven't had time to think about it and appreciate it like I did with Ella.  With her, I rubbed my belly and talked to her all the time.  This time, I barely even give my belly a second thought...unless it's itchy...or James is kicking the crap out of me...or there is a problem.

Oh, well.  I guess I'll just have to get used to the whole idea pretty quickly.  I'm definitely looking forward to seeing my little man and having my body back to myself.  I'm just having some anxiety about the whole situation.

I think what makes it so bad is that I really don't have anyone to talk to who had their kids relatively close recent times.  Even my mom had my brother and me almost 13 years apart.  My oldest sister is almost 7 years younger than me. Most of my friends had their kids spread out.  Ella will be 22 months old when James is born.

I guess my most difficult thing to process is that I wish I had more time with Ella before James gets here.  I wish I could have seen her grow up a little more.  However, Jay and I met and got married in our late 20's, and I want to have all our childbearing out of the way before I turn 35 because I don't want to worry about the medical complications that tend to come at that age.  So, we had our kids closer together.

All I know is that IF we decide to have a 3rd child, it will be when Ella and James are a couple of years older.  James will have to be 2 BEFORE we even consider trying again.  I just am not sure I can do this whole pregnancy thing again.  Too much anxiety, and way too taxing when you're chasing a toddler around.

Not to mention the fact that Jay found out he's probably getting deployed next fall.  So, I'm going to be here with an almost 3 year old, an almost 1 year old, 2 dogs and a cat for 7 months by myself.  I don't blame him.  He can't do anything about it.  It's just really hard to process right now.  Jay's going to miss Thanksgiving, Christmas, James's first birthday, Ella's birthday and our anniversary.  Kind of sucks.  Oh, well.  Not a whole lot I can do about it, and I'm trying not to think about it.  At least he'll be on a ship for 7 months and out of harm's way for the most part.  This will be our first deployment.  We've been together 4 years now.  Craziness.

Anyway.  Sorry for the long vent post today.  Just having one of those days.  :)

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Happy End of Daylight Savings...

Here's to limited sleep with a toddler!  Jay and I decided to stay up last night watching "The Walking Dead" series on Netflix.  I hate zombie shows...or horror shows in general.  He, on the other hand, loves them.  So, I told him that as long as he played in my hair thoroughly, he can watch whatever he wants.  SO, we watched it until about midnight.  Of course, I couldn't sleep after that because I was afraid zombies would invade my pregnancy dreams.  So, we watched "Something Borrowed" on the computer in bed until 2 this morning.  Totally regretting that decision, but zombie dreams!  :)  Of course, my sweet little angel woke up an hour earlier this morning...well, on time to her, but an hour early due to the time change.  Needless to say I'm exhausted.  Jay was so sweet to take care of Ella this morning so I could sleep in.  :)

I am hoping I won't have to make a trip to L&D today, though.  Started having some infrequent, uncomfortable contractions last night, accompanied by menstrual-like cramping.  I had about 4 of them in an hour at one point.  Changed my position and hydrated, but they didn't stop.  They eventually stopped on their own, thank goodness.  I had a couple this morning, but they were more Braxton Hicks than what I experienced last night.  Probably need to start drinking my jug o' water to keep them at bay.

Anyway.  It's laundry time.  I'll be glad to get it done and out of the way.  :)

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Can I have a do over, please?

Remember how I said I was going to get all this stuff done today before my mom came?  Yeah....that didn't happen.

The dogs kept me up most of the night chewing their butts and licking themselves.  We even drugged them with Benedryl, but it didn't help.  Plus, I was sweating to death and burning up.  The joys of being pregnant.  You are the human inferno.

This morning, after going to the bathroom, I noticed some of my mucus plug coming out.  So, I called the doctor's office and basically begged to keep my appointment for 10 am tomorrow instead of coming in....but of course, I had to go in to be checked. "Just come on in.  It's not busy, so it won't take long."  Yeah...

I get there at 10:30ish, but I didn't get to leave until about 12:45 because they converted to an electronic system, and the system was all messed up.  I was expecting Mom to arrive around 12:30.  Go figure.

Anyway.  I haven't gained any weight in 2 weeks.  YAY for me.  :)  They weren't concerned about that, and neither am I.  James is doing well.  Moving quite nicely.  He's still breech.  They aren't going to worry about it until 36 weeks.  If he's still breech, then they will attempt a version.  I am praying for no C-Section.  I do NOT want a CS at all if I can help it.

They checked me, and it was the worst cervical check I have ever experienced in my life.  It felt like the doc was trying to poke my brain through my cervix.  She said I was dilated 1 cm on the outside, but the inside of my cervix was nice and closed.  So, that's good.  Pelvic rest until 34 weeks, but everything looks good.  They said the dilation is normal for being a second-time mom.

Of course, the whole time I'm there, Ella was screaming and being a butt.  I gave her some ibuprofen when we got home.  I think she's still teething.  Mom was here, of course.  She was sweet enough to wash the dishes and fold Ella's clothes for me.  I made a pork roast for dinner, which was absolutely delicious!!!  Soooooooooo tender and yummy!!  Even made some banana nut bread for dessert, and it was everything I hoped it would be.  :)

I'm going to go make a carrot cake for my grandmother, now.  Jay i about to bathe Ella, and we're just going to relax.  So glad to have my mom here for the rest of the week.  :)